


Not Accepting Losing You

by The_Eclectic_Reader23



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies), Thor: Dark World - Fandom
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Feels, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt Loki (Marvel), Hurt/Comfort, Loki (Marvel) Feels, Protective Loki (Marvel), Romantic Loki (Marvel), Romantic Soulmates, Sad with a Happy Ending, Soulmates, Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, World is too much for a sensible soul
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:20:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24411202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Eclectic_Reader23/pseuds/The_Eclectic_Reader23
Summary: "The world they lived in wasn't simple. It never had been."Soulmates exist and everyone has one of their own. Even Loki. He feels his soulmate's pain and finally persuades Thor to teleport her to him for one night (only one) so he could make her feel better and loved.
Relationships: Loki & Thor (Marvel), Loki (Marvel)/Original Female Character(s), Loki (Marvel)/Reader
Comments: 11
Kudos: 133





	Not Accepting Losing You

The world they lived in wasn't simple. It never had been.

It was the world of soulmates. Never easy, never working in their favour. 

As Loki thought, it was a lie to keep all the other hopeless romantics at bay, waiting, praying to be noticed and found. Loved.

He had spent years and years of this glorious, godlike eternity hoping to find any traces of his own soulmate, any connection to his 'other half'. 

He smiled. The concept of other halves always seemed like a ridicule to him. For who could be that cruel to split a soul in two parts, almost always too different than the other one? 

That was what Loki thought. That's why he had given up on it long time ago. The Golden Age came and passed, and all Loki had now was his small cell underneath the palace of Asgard, sentenced to be locked up and away till Ragnarok comes. 

But then he felt it. 

The string of destiny crawled up behind his heart, erasing parts of venom which filled it with rioting sensation. It happened to be a new sort of an emotion, something he was already familiar with, but didn't care to name it. He didn't want to name it. 

There was a certain amount of fear in naming it. It would mean he recognizes, he accepts the feeling for what it is - love.

Because it was _love_. 

And Loki, the god of mischief, couldn't dare to bear the weakness of it. 

* * *

Her dreams he can't find. 

But he feels her. 

The terrors coming from her heart. 

He cannot see or hear her. He cannot talk to her. 

He meets her and knows her through her feelings. 

And all she feels is melancholy, and fright, and loneliness. 

As much as he does. 

He cannot stand it. 

The possibility of a soulmate, of having a one he could actually feel loved by and give some love in return. He did know how to love somebody; it was the rest of the galaxy who believed him to be nothing but a monster that kills, rips inside and apart. 

That's who he was. Now he is all the same, _but in love_. 

A monster like him cannot love, can it? 

Loki thinks, the anger and pain he'd been through, which raged his unsettled spirit, now appeared to be much calmer and tamed as he feels the presence of another being in his heart. 

He can only feel. Dear gods, how much of a pain in her soul could be measured. There is no single trace of a tranquility, no peace and no battle. There is only war her soul's been trapped with, and she doesn't win. 

It feels like she doesn't even want to. 

_I need to get you out of there_ , he thinks, finding himself almost praying for her to hear him and give him an answer. _I need you to feel all right, but you must give me a sign that you want to be saved._

He waits for days. There is nothing. She doesn't answer him. She doesn't call for him.

Did she even hear a word of his desperate prayer? Did she notice a tingling in her body when he tried to reach her? 

Loki felt it all. 

_Just a sign of yours to put my soul to rest, as I can't stop thinking about you._

Such a ridiculous action of him, isn't it? To despise the love from the beginning, after unsuccessful attempt to search for it, just to grab its chance of happening in his cold hands. 

He could kid anyone but himself. He was a child desiring for a shielded love, the one he would be the only to have. 

Loki, the tireless trickster, decided he'd settle only for her love if he could keep it. 

Now this soulmate mark wasn't the weakness he'd escape, but a power he would draw strength from.

* * *

She answers him one night, another one Loki spends mostly awake like a true insomniac. _You are really out there?_

Loki replies. _I am._

He feels the hesitation in her voice. _Did you mean it?_

Loki nods, coming to the senses she can't see him. _What did you hear?_

He notices a small feeling of disturbance in the air, knowing there is not enough time and the wall he's broken will quickly close itself again, cutting her away completely out of his reach. 

_You can save me?_

He only thinks for a second before answering blindly. _I will._

But she is gone already. He's lost the connection he struggled for months to grasp. And it only worked for a moment. 

Universe has its strangest ways to connect and seperate two star-crossed lovers. 

Loki has his own unconventional ways too. Thanks to the spell he had cast upon their soulmate mark, he managed to get a current location of her whereabouts. 

He knows where to find her. The next step he has to take is to get someone to bring her to him.

The trickster grins just about as he knows who he will use for the role of a messenger.

For the rest of the night, Loki finally gets first peaceful sleep since he's been in the dungeons.

_I found you. Now nothing can stop me. Not even Death itself._

_I found you._

* * *

Loki knew how to get things done his way (even if it took longer to wait for). Right now, the ace up his sleeve was Thor.

"You ask me to go to Midgard? The same place you planned to destroy, brother?" 

Loki nodded patiently. 

"Yes. And for the record: _rule it_. I planned to rule it."

Thor smiled weakly, letting out a huff. "Perhaps it is for the better you're down here."

Loki shrugged his lean shoulders, pretending not to care that much. "Perhaps it is."

"What is it that you want?" 

Loki looked up to meet his brother's eyes. Should he tell him? Is it wise? Would it be safe? 

He hated the fact he cared about Thor even now, when he is among the ones who crucified him for the goodness' sake. He hated it. 

But he told him anyway. There was no one else to do it for him. 

* * *

Thor visits his cell at deep night hour. Loki is already waiting in impatience. 

"I sensed you would come, Thor."

"I don't have much time, Loki." Thor hisses. "I will do as you asked; but know not to cause any trickery of yours. Otherwise, father will hear about it." 

"Would you dare to admit betrayal?" Loki nudges him. 

"Don't play with me, brother. You are in no condition to negotiate." 

"Fair enough." Loki raises his hands. 

Thor's eyes soften as he looks at him. He knew of Loki's heartcore. He was never too much of a monster, but not too much of a truth speaker as well. 

But this seems real. 

And if there is a chance to redeem his younger brother, his childhood friend - he would do everything to get him on the right path. 

"I hope it will bring you peace, Loki. I truly hope so." 

Loki offers him his best smile. "It will, Thor. Don't doubt me."

His older brother laughs as he turns to leave. "Did I ever?" 

_I'm coming for you._

* * *

She almost doesn't notice the change in the air at first. 

The room feels colder; the absence of the blanket makes her shiver. 

The bed seems to be more comfortable to sink in... and full.

There is a body laying across her own; she can feel the breaths it lets out in a slow manner.

It scares her immediately, but she's not brave to open her eyes and see who is the culprit. 

But then she feels _that_. 

The string of the fate. The force of positivity that pushes through her body and soul with an emotion she hasn't felt in awhile. 

He is beside her. He came and he saved her.

_You're here._

She hears him laugh. It's such a pleasant sound; it feels nice and wholesome.

"Of course I am, dear." He speaks. His voice is calm, sensitive. Nostalgic. She likes it. 

"Now, please, open your eyes. I want to finally see you." 

She does, slowly, but with reluctance. Loki holds her upper arm as if she is going to break like porcelain. 

And she sees him. Loki's eyes, looking at her warmly, like turbulent galaxies she had always wanted to travel to. 

And he sees her. The type of eyes he would surrender his soul for, only to be met with a magical abyss; the ocean eyes. 

But her ocean eyes are crying. 

"Don't cry, I beg of you." 

She waves her head, lowering it down, thus breaking eye contact with him. 

But Loki accepts no tears for an answer. A finger of his traces along her jawline and picks her chin up a little. She shudders at the gentle action.

"You're breaking my heart." Loki whispers, his pepermint breath warming up her cheeks. "Please, don't cry." 

He sobs. The sound is horrifying; the sound of utter agony and despair. It makes her cry more. 

"I am lonely." She speaks out, but quietly. "I am so lonely." 

"No, no, no." Loki interjects. "You're not. You'll never be. I am here." 

Before she can say anything, he pulls her closer in a tight embrace, laying his hands on her back and squeezing lightly. 

"I'm here", he repeats. "I found you. As I promised to." 

She nods and opens her eyes again. But now she doesn't look away from him. As if he is an illusion, and she could lose him in a blink. She doesn't want to.

It finally feels good again. Her heart finally feels good again. 

"I saved you. I _feel_ you." 

"I feel you too. I... I sense you too..."

Loki smiles weakly. Both his joy and own tears mix up, and he feels as if he's gone insane. 

Does he deserve to be this happy? With her in his arms and close to his heartbeat? 

"I have no right of claiming you as my love yet, my darling." He speaks. "But there will come a day." 

"Will it?" 

Loki nods. "Yes. I will come for you; don't forget this promise. I will always keep coming back to you. That much I can assure you of." 

"Thank you." She says as one tear falls down her left cheek. 

Loki wips it off. 

"There is no need. Just don't cry anymore. It will not get bad again." 

"How can you know? These emotions don't go away easily." 

"I will chase them away then?" He offers, stroking a thumb over the place the last tear landed on. "Don't cry. No tear deserves to be spilt from your beautiful eyes." 

She blushes at the compliment. 

"I may have mistaken myself." Loki leans in, never taking sight off her. He inspects every little action of hers, trying not to scare her off or cause potentional harm to her unsettled psyche. "You're beautiful through and through." 

"And you're too kind and caring." She says softly. "I like that." 

"Oh, I know there are people who wouldn't agree with your statement." Loki laughs. 

"I know who you are." She replies, her voice turning silent. 

Loki hums, but says nothing. Fear knocks in from inside, and he is scared, scared he could lose her as fast as he got her. 

"And I know there were reasons for it." 

"Can't say if they were all justified." Loki responds. Is he trying to defend himself? 

"I can feel your emotions too, you know that?" She looks at Loki before she continues, wanting not to upset him. He only nods, speechlessly, and she collects all the courage to speak next words. "I've felt your sadness as equally as you have felt mine, and I... I hope I can make it better. I hope I can make you less hurt." 

"You can. You already have." 

"I want to know you better. I want to meet you." 

"There will come a time for it as well." Loki says, leaning his forehead against hers. "But now, may I have one request?" 

"Yes?" She asks hopefully.

"Would it...," he smiles, redness coming to his cold cheeks. "Would it bother you if I kiss you?" 

"No." She responds. 

And Loki kisses her. It's nothing much but a nice, short, warm kiss, but it means too much. And it speaks too much. 

It speaks of a love that could be born from the flames, and that could be a refuge for their wounded hearts.

"This... kiss...," she whispers. "It means you're not staying with me?" 

"Not now."

"But you will come for me?" 

"I will, darling." He brings her more close to him. "And I will never let you go once I come to you." 

"I'll wait as much as it needs." She accepts, suppressing a yawn. 

Loki smiles. "Are you tired, love?" 

"A bit." She confesses. "Can I stay here for a night?"

Loki shifts his position, but says nothing. How could he? He wants to hold her, get her, cherish her, love her. He wants everything with her, as she is his soulmate, his number one priority from now on. 

But he is not sure how will this play out. 

"Just give me this moment." She pleads, knowing his silence is more likely to be a 'no' than a 'yes'. 

Loki closes his eyes, forcing himself to say: "I can't." It hurts to say that, but he _can't_. 

"Please. Just a night. Nothing else. Just this moment so I can remember you."

Loki keeps being silent. 

"So I can know _it was real_." 

Now he looks at her; she is finally smiling as she's watching him, hearing every word he had to say, understanding every action he had to take to get to her. 

_I belong to her. My place is with her._

He sighs. "Just a night. That's only I can offer you now." 

"Thank you." She says again. 

"I'm sorry it couldn't have been more."

"It's already the best you could give me." 

Loki hugs her; swiftly, tightly. He hugs her like she is the radiating light. And she reciprocates the hug. 

"You can rest now, darling." Loki says in her ear. "I will be here." 

She smiles, and then she closes her eyes. 

* * *

It's almost a coming dawn. 

She is still asleep in his arms, breathing slowly and steadily. A smile is seen in the corner of her pinkish lips. 

Loki is looking at her; he didn't stop. There is too much of beauty in her he wants to see and remember. 

Thor sneaks and opens the cell. 

"Brother-"

"I've sensed you coming." Loki interjects. "Don't worry, _brother_. She can go."

Thor nods, standing closer to the bed. 

"Just keep her safe." Loki says, tiredly. "You do know she needs to get home safe, don't you?" 

"Yes, Loki, I do. No harm will be done to her under my guard." 

"Heimdall will keep his mouth shut about it as well, I assume?" Loki growls. 

"He swore to me. He will." 

"All right then." Loki responds, turning to have one final look at her before Thor brings her back. 

He places a soft kiss on her hair, murmuring: _Always you_. 

"We'll better be going, Loki." Thor speaks, eyeing the halls. Guards haven't noticed anything. 

Loki lets go. For now. 

As Thor takes her in his arms, covering her with a blanket to avoid suspicions, Loki gives him a quick glance. 

" _Thank you_." 

Thor opens and closes the cell again. 

"Always, brother." 

* * *

_She wakes up tomorrow morning._

_Looking around, she notices it's her usual room, her usual life. Looking at the other side of a bed, she sees it is empty. She realizes she's alone._

_There is tugging in her heart, and there is warmth in her mind._

_There is a kiss on her lips, and there is a moon in her hair._

_Somehow it was not a dream. Somehow he is real._

_She gets out of the bed and goes to the window. The big city is spreading in her view. There are many of people on the streets._

_It's raining, but raindrops_ _remind her of tears and sadness and melancholia no longer._

_She could swear there are tiny cracks of Sun trying to break in through the clouds, to shine the troubles away._

_And she smiles._

* * *

Loki lays in his prison cell, looking at the ceiling. 

He's rather quiet, distracted by his own deep thoughts. 

Guards aren't overly affected by his ignorance, but neither easily settled with the prince's serene presence. 

Loki's too dangerous when he is in the vulnerable state. 

But he's thinking of her. 

The fragile touch she has, and the sensitive affection she craves. 

The sophisticated elegance in her moves, and the captivating strength she's illuminated with. 

She is the source of his hope, love, peace and redemption. Home. 

She is a home to his only, broken, mischief heart. 

"I will not lose you." He mutters to himself. "I'm not accepting losing you. At any cost. At any chance." 

And Loki smiles.


End file.
